• @whatisallthis@lemm.ee
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    2 years ago

    Bidet attachments for your toilet are about $30 and you can install it yourself with zero skills in 30 minutes.

    Wouldn’t you pay $30 to never have to wipe shit again? Just dry off and that’s it. Greatest thing imaginable.

    • @Knightfall@lemmy.ca
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      72 years ago

      I know it’s ignorant, but all I can imagine when using a bidet for the first time is shooting my corn hole with a jet of cold water, not knowing how clean it is back there, and using a towel to dry off only to find watered down shit on the towel.

      • @Mlemm@lemm.ee
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        42 years ago

        I was reluctant to get a bidet because I couldn’t hook it up to a warm water line, and was pleasantly surprised when I realized buttholes really aren’t that temperature sensitive. Even in the dead of winter, cold well water shot straight up the butthole doesn’t feel cold or shocking at all. Probably impossible to believe unless you try it yourself.

        Also, don’t be a monster and dry your butthole with a towel. Just use a little bit of toilet paper so if you’re still dirty, it’s okay. It’s not like your whole rear-end gets soaked, it’s a very thin steam of water that targets just your butthole, with maybe a tiny bit of spray on the surrounding area

      • @EssentialCoffee@midwest.social
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        22 years ago

        It’s only surprising or strange the first time. If you aren’t acutely aware of how the water of a shower hits your skin every time you shower, then you won’t notice the bidet more than the first or second time.

      • spectre [he/him]
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        2 years ago

        You can get ones with heated water and warm air drying capability (they are more than $30 though)

    • Samus Crankpork
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      62 years ago

      I’ve got one in my apartment unused. Our toilet’s a weird big moulded piece and I couldn’t get to the plastic bolts keeping the seat on…

      • @Mic_Check_One_Two@reddthat.com
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        2 years ago

        Yeah, my last apartment had toilets that weren’t compatible. The supply hose going to the tank actually had a compression washer and went all the way through the tank before attaching to the valve. Like I couldn’t just unscrew the water hose from the bottom of the tank to tie in, because there wasn’t anything to unscrew. The hose just went straight through to the inside of the tank.

        I’ve never seen anything like it before or since. It honestly had me baffled, and I was left settling for baby wipes until I could move into my current place. And you’d best bet that during my walkthrough for my current place, I checked the toilet to see if it would work with my bidet. The leasing agent looked at me like I was crazy when I dove behind the toilet, but it’s a new checkbox on my list.

        • @everett@lemmy.ml
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          2 years ago

          I’ve read about people connecting theirs by running a hose from the sink connection to the bidet. Normally you’d only do that to get hot water into the mix, but I guess it’s also an option to get basic cold water if you’re stuck with a fussy toilet.

      • @MrShankles@reddthat.com
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        22 years ago

        I did have to shave some of the plastic from mine to get the toilet lid to close naturally. Not the same situation, but they do on occasion, require a little creativity

    • @xilliah@beehaw.org
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      2 years ago

      You’ve clearly never eaten Pringles.

      Edit: I would like to take this opportunity to apologize to everyone who stumbled upon this comment and the thread that follows.

    • @mister_monster@monero.town
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      -12 years ago

      So, how do you bidet to squeaky clean without touching your shit covered asshole? I know Indian people run water down the small of their back with a pitcher and wash that way, with their hand. Then they wash their hand. I’d like to avoid getting shit on my hands.

    • Nix
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      -42 years ago

      I’ve read these tend to cause issues with your pipes though