And no “water with a twist of lemon/slice of cucumber” goofs. Water isn’t allowed.

        • Nougat
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          2 years ago

          Based on the posed question and its limiting conditions, elemental mercury is a correct answer. Pure hydrogen peroxide or isopropyl alcohol would qualify, too.

          If you include materials which are liquid outside of “room temperature,” things like magma and liquid nitrogen would also be correct answers.

          • AshDene
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            72 years ago

            Olive oil?

            You wouldn’t live long, but compared to the other options you’re listing…

        • @mlc894@lemm.ee
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          42 years ago

          Not quite, actually! I mean, it’s not good for you, but once it’s in your digestive tract it mostly passes straight through rather than being absorbed. The vapor over the liquid is more dangerous, but once you’ve swallowed it that’s not a concern.

      • Square Singer
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        132 years ago

        You’ll drink this until the end of your life. Works the same with molten iron though.

        • Nougat
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          I posit that any substance which can be ingested as a liquid by pouring it from a container into one’s mouth (the act of “drinking”) is, by definition, a “drink.”

    • @li10@feddit.uk
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      132 years ago

      True, but at the same time you know exactly what OP means with this question.

      • DarraignTheSane
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        2 years ago

        I don’t think OP knows what they mean with this question. The top two ‘serious’ answers are coffee and tea, which is just “hot water with shit mixed in”. Anything you drink is water with shit mixed in. Any answer that isn’t “water with shit mixed in” means you die, either within months or minutes. Most answers that are “water with shit mixed in” would still kill you fairly quickly if that’s all you ever drank.

        • @li10@feddit.uk
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          2 years ago

          I think OP knows exactly what they mean, I think if you asked a five year old they’d know what they mean.

          Yet for some reason, some people are completely missing the point of a very simple question which boils down to “if you couldn’t drink regular water, what would you have instead”…

          • snowe
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            82 years ago

            That’s not “exactly” what they mean, as the difference between what you think they’re saying and other commenters think is clearly different. Is la croix or bubbly allowed? If not then what about a hard seltzer? If those are allowed then why isn’t lemon water allowed? If those aren’t allowed then where is the line? Gatorade is seltzer water without the bubbles and with electrolytes. It’s clear that OP’s question was not well thought out, hence why so many people here have a problem with it.

            • snowe
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              82 years ago

              And yet the main answer in this thread is “tea” which is clearly just water with leaves in it. Why is that different than water with lemons in it? Just because you didn’t have a problem with the question doesn’t mean the question doesn’t have major problems. You just didn’t notice the problems.

        • LanternEverywhere
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          The point of OP’s question is clear. He’s referring to a drink that has sensory qualities that are clearly distinct from plain water. Water with a spritz of lemon still reads as water. As a loose guideline this is like anything you’d order as “water with x” or “x water”, like cucumber water. Coffee clearly doesn’t fit into that category, it has sensory qualities that are very different than water with x in it.

              • queermunist she/her
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                -32 years ago

                If I ask anyone for a glass of water, they’re going to get me the same thing because they know what I mean. No one is going to get me a glass of orange juice or tea or 7up, even though that’s technically also water.

                You know what OP means. You’re being ridiculous.

                • snowe
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                  22 years ago

                  so then do you agree that they wouldn’t bring you lemon water or cucumber water? clearly you didn’t ask for those. but OP explicitly calls those out as ‘no goofs’. so where’s the line?

          • LanternEverywhere
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            This is not true. Coffee is a mild diuretic, but the amount of water you consume along with it is way way more than the amount of water that the caffeine induces you to pee out.

          • parrot-party
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            32 years ago

            Dude. Yes they have some small diuretic effects but tea and coffee are overwhelmingly hydrating. It’s just not a good idea to mainline that much caffeine for heart reasons.

          • DarraignTheSane
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            22 years ago

            Sure, added that note in an edit. There’s no answer here that doesn’t result in your early death.

    • @hglman@lemmy.ml
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      102 years ago

      A friend had to read a paper about what people called water vs. how much water made up the substance. So like pond water has less water than tea, we call one water one tea. Truly thrilling research.

    • Dandroid
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      I had this argument with my roommate once. It was probably the biggest argument we ever had. IMO, just because it has water in it doesn’t mean that the drink is water. Like, some people don’t like the taste of water, but that doesn’t mean that they don’t like milk, which has water in it.

      For me a beverage is defined by its flavor, not its components.

  • @Empricorn@feddit.nl
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    662 years ago

    EVERY drink is water!

    • Soda is less water and some sugar mixture
    • Juice is less water and some squished fruit
    • Beer is less water and some cooked hops
    • Tea is less water and some leaf infusion
    • Coffee is less water and some roasted bean-juice
    • A martini is even less water with some alcohol and old squished fruit

    So DON’T TELL ME WATER ISN’T ALLOWED! Damn, this is making me irrationally angry. Maybe I need some water…

      • @ttk@feddit.de
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        12 years ago

        Whole milk is just water with some emulgated fat in it. Fresh squeezed juice is just water with some biomass in it.

        I suppose we need to switch to sunflower oil or something. It is digestible, has no water in it, but isnt exactly healthy.

    • AttackBunny
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      62 years ago

      Agreed, but in theory you wouldn’t be able to add milk (it’s a drink after all)

      I prefer green tea personally, but recently found some Hawaiian Mamaki Tea, and I’m loving it.

  • redimk
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    362 years ago

    Dr. Pepper because I’m here for a fun time not a long time.

  • CarlsIII
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    152 years ago

    If “drinks that contain water” are not allowed, then nothing. I will die of thirst.

  • jsveiga
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    152 years ago

    Coconut water fresh from a refrigerated coconut. I would only drink that, even if I didn’t have to, if it was cheap enough.

  • Beto
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    152 years ago

    Whiskey on the rocks.

    I can suck the ice cubes during the day, and drink the whiskey at night.

    • ndguardian
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      22 years ago

      Make it a scotch for me! I don’t even put ice in it. Got a neat little cup that goes in the freezer to chill it.

  • @StantonVitales@beehaw.org
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    2 years ago

    Water is in every beverage, this question is unanswerable.

    Even without trying to be pedantic, what about Vitamin Water? Cuz my answer would genuinely be tropical citrus vitamin water. I could also do Mountain Dew, which btw contains water.

    So the question becomes based on the exclusion of water without additives, which begs the question, why not lemon water then, and what amount of additives qualifies it as ‘not water’ anymore? If I use lemon extract and sugar does that count as lemonade? If so, why isn’t water with lemon extract considered unsweetened lemonade?